Every semester I learn something from my students. Over the years I've learned to have patience with other people and mostly myself. I've learned how to communicate--not just to be heard to be able to listen and respond affectively. I've learned how to hold my space and the space of the class so that no one or no thing can come in and disrupt our purpose. This term, however, was a doosy. I have arrived at a time in my life when I can offer sincere compassion.
What is compassion? The abbreviated dictionary I have defines it as deep sympathy and even pity. I exercise my right not to agree with that. I define compassion as the ability to recognize another person's struggle or pain and even be able to live, for a moment, in that person's shoes. In addition, it is the ability, once that frame of reference is set, to be able to extend oneself as a solution or respite from struggle or pain.
As one who has had her share of struggle, even suffering, a person in that situation does not need pity. When I am in the midst of my struggle or pain, I want a way out. I want to know that tomorrow is going to bring something better. It has taken years for me to realize that the learning experience is one wrought with struggle, because the nature of growth is to struggle to leave old ways behind to don the new--evolve if you will.
I used to teach with tough love. I was afraid that if I showed any softness that they would not only disrespect me but also run over me. With growth I have learned how to hold my space, set standards (for myself and my students), and still act as a feeling human being.
Growing is sometimes hard work. It has to be done, but it is so much more comforting and beautiful when there is someone there who has the ability to reveal to you what tomorrow can bring--what growth feels like after the pain.
Compassion allows me to be human, but in an elevated form. I can acknowledge the unpleasantness, yet be the catalyst for hope and determination. In an ideal world, there would be much more compassion--for those who hurt, for those who have lost sight of hope, even for those who continue to hope when there is no hope in sight, for those who are lost.
I pray that there is compassion for me.
What do you think?
What is compassion? The abbreviated dictionary I have defines it as deep sympathy and even pity. I exercise my right not to agree with that. I define compassion as the ability to recognize another person's struggle or pain and even be able to live, for a moment, in that person's shoes. In addition, it is the ability, once that frame of reference is set, to be able to extend oneself as a solution or respite from struggle or pain.
As one who has had her share of struggle, even suffering, a person in that situation does not need pity. When I am in the midst of my struggle or pain, I want a way out. I want to know that tomorrow is going to bring something better. It has taken years for me to realize that the learning experience is one wrought with struggle, because the nature of growth is to struggle to leave old ways behind to don the new--evolve if you will.
I used to teach with tough love. I was afraid that if I showed any softness that they would not only disrespect me but also run over me. With growth I have learned how to hold my space, set standards (for myself and my students), and still act as a feeling human being.
Growing is sometimes hard work. It has to be done, but it is so much more comforting and beautiful when there is someone there who has the ability to reveal to you what tomorrow can bring--what growth feels like after the pain.
Compassion allows me to be human, but in an elevated form. I can acknowledge the unpleasantness, yet be the catalyst for hope and determination. In an ideal world, there would be much more compassion--for those who hurt, for those who have lost sight of hope, even for those who continue to hope when there is no hope in sight, for those who are lost.
I pray that there is compassion for me.
What do you think?
6 comments:
There is some hope when it comes to compassion. Just who is the hope for?? I used to have compassion for others in terrible stuations.But still questioning what's the point. Maybe it's there fault they are in this situation. I know I care just don't know how much.
Heaton, K English 101/Sec. 4031
This was deep! Compassion have everything to do with what is in side a persons heart. Being hateful does not get a good response to anything. Believe me I tried it and all it did was hurt even more.
There is a way to be stict and firm without the bad vibes. I worked with children of all ages and teachers with different attitudes, but I still have a good disposition about myself.
When my only child passed away I was hurt and bitter to no end.In my mind God took the only person I truely cared about. My son was sick for seven years and after all the struggles and pain I suffer he was gone for ever.
But through it all God brought me through the tribulations of heartaches and pain. My heart is full of warmth and compassion now because the children at my job makes me fill blessed everyday.
In short my sister, God it the way, the truth and light to compassion of hurt and pain. Giving tough love, does not come from being mean and naughty. Tough love comes from deep deep inside one's mind, soul, heart and spirit and the compassion of the heart will follow.
As a result, of your body being toxic, the poison will come out one way or another. If your heart is foul no matter how well a person may dress, a heart attack can still happen. Your system need to be clean. When a person's heart is clean,the compassion and beauty will shine through like a shiny new nickle.
Don't weary there is compassion for you. Just keep a positive attitude and the vibes will follow.
Brown, J English 101 Sec.4029
I was not a very compassionate person, I believed that compassion was for the weak and that showing compassion was showing a sign of weakness or softness like you said.
This post has shown me that compassion isn't for the weak but the strong and the courageous. To show compassion is showing a chance for the world to be a better place.
This wasn't what I expected from an English teacher to not only teach me the correct way to write a paper but also teaching me the way to live a better life.
C.Santana english 101- 4029
Compassion, in my opinion is a feeling that a person might get when they feel sorry for someone but to the extent where you feel the need to give them a helpful hand. Even though the person that needs the help might see it as a bad thing, compassion needs to be passed around in order for others to survive.
S.MOORE, class section 4019
Alot of times we somewhat lose sight of what being compassionate is. We somewhat confuse it with alot of things. I think its just being meekly humble and lending a helping hand to a hopeless heart and building up what was broken down. I think that if alot more people would let there guards down just a little bit then we just might be able to see a mere speck of the good in another human being.
G Pickett 4019,
Compassion is very important in a career field such as teaching. You work with students from all walks of life and you cant approach everyone in the same way. some people need tough love some need tenderness so if you place yourself in a position to be open the need of your students then you set yourself up for success. Being compassionate is a gift and if you have that gift i think you should use it.
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